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Dear Bubby,
I am a 16 year old sophomore. I like this junior at my school. We have the same interests and talk quite a bit online and a little in person also. One night we spent almost 3 hours talking.
A lot of my friends know that I like him. One of my friends cautioned me not to get obsessed, so I have kept my promise, and just concentrated on being friends with him. However a week ago I found out that two of the friends I told about my "crush" were persuading him to ask another girl to the prom. I got very disappointed and felt a bit betrayed, but thought nothing of it.
I continued to become better friends with my "crush" and finally convinced myself that I should let him know I liked him. I gathered up my courage, but then chickened out. I tried again the next day, but I didn't find an opportune moment to get him alone. Then that night I found out that he asked the other girl to go to prom. I was crushed. That feeling of betrayal strengthened, even though I know I shouldn't feel betrayed. I know my two friends only wanted to help their other friend, but I can't help feeling disappointed.
Every time I talk to my "crush" I feel more and more strongly about him. I enjoy his humor and his sarcasm. He has a temper that matches my own and he intrigues me all around. I find his faults as much a part of his character as his attributes, and I admire him greatly. I don't know how I should handle this situation. I don't expect you to know exactly how to handle this, but any advice you have for me would be greatly appreciated. Should I talk to my two friends? Or the other friend? Should I say anything to my "crush"? I'm terribly confused.
Awaiting anxiously for a reply,
Crushed.
Dear Crushed,
First of all -- I don't see that you have true friends in these other girls. If they were really interested in you they would make sure your "crush" would take you to the prom. Now it is too late.
However If I were you and you are so friendly with him, I would tell him (as in a Joke): How come you did not ask me to the prom?
Nothing wrong in that -- you want to know where you stand with him. By his answer you will know if you should find yourself another "crush" and forget about him. If he is truly sorry, he will apologize and the air will be cleared and you will be the same old buddies.
A word of caution -- FIND ANOTHER 'CRUSH' and make him jealous.
Good luck.
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