Help Me, Bubby!

Other Bubby Books at Amazon:

Bubby Irma's Kitchen

Yiddish Your Bubbe Never Taught You

Poetry by Jewish Grandaughters

Bubbe & Gram

Bubbe's Kitchen

My Bubbe's Arms

Bubbie & Zeide's Favorite Language

Bennett and His Bubbe's Beau

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Friday, April 30, 2004
Dearest Bubby,

About a year ago I met someone. He lives nearly 700 miles away, so we hardly get to spend time together. I graduate college in two years, he graduated three years ago and has a strong job.

My heart patters when I hear his voice, and I get butterflies when I think of him. I truly believe he's the one. I love him so much my heart wants to leap out of my chest. When I hear his voice, it calms all of my fears. He is the most wonderful gentleman I have ever met, and actually ranks up there with my father!! (2nd to daddy of course, but he's up there!) He is extremely intelligent, family oriented, and has a strong faith - the three most important things in the world to me.

Shortly before we saw each other again, I was diagnosed with temporary facial paralysis. I was extremely self-conscious and embarrassed. But he told me I was beautiful, and said bells palsy can't touch the beauty I have in my mind and my heart.

So what could the problem possibly be? I am absolutely terrified! I have been independent for all these years and now I feel like I have turned into mush. Should I tell him how much I feel for him, or just keep saying, "let's see where it'll go"? I have tried to forget him, or stop these feelings, but it's impossible.

Do you have any advice for this love-struck woman?
Sorry for my ramblings.


Dear A.,

First you must be under a doctor's care and take care of that palsy. Many years ago my friend had the same problem. It came on as a result of a bad cold. However, it took some time but she did recover. The best to you.

Now -- this young man -- I think you are a wise lady telling him, "we'll see what happens." You still have to finish your college program and I can tell you from experience it is a must. I had a similar experience when I was in college and when "he" said to me, "I am going to marry you" I laughed and said, "I have two more years in college." And his answer was, "That's OK - we'll wait." I saw him once a month but I got lots of letters and phone calls.

Three years later we got married and had a wonderful marriage.
The same to you.

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By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.

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Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

Now with this new website, Bubby can finally share her wisdom with the rest of the world. And she's excited about it! (Which confuses us, because she used to say we were all she needed.)

Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.

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