Help Me, Bubby!

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Bubby Irma's Kitchen

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Poetry by Jewish Grandaughters

Bubbe & Gram

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My Bubbe's Arms

Bubbie & Zeide's Favorite Language

Bennett and His Bubbe's Beau

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Dear Bubby,

My daughter's headstart teacher thinks that I do not spend enough time with my children. She's older than me. It's funny because I am majoring in Child Development and I know all the classic signs of negativity with parents and teachers. Thursday is my daughter's preschool graduation. I had to change the dates on my finals in order to accommodate my daughter at her graduation. I could not attend her field trip though because it would throw me further behind on school assignments.

Why do people not understand that a single mother must get the proper education that is needed for women to make a good salary? I do not have time when I have to pull 40 hours a week and attend full time college hours. Her teacher knows my situation but she still does not understand. She has these snide expressions on her face like I am full of excuses.

Maybe you have some advice on what I should say to her, in order to make her understand. The time I spend with my children is in the afternoon and we also go out every weekend for more quality time together.


Dear Shannon,

I think you are doing the best you can with your daughter and the teacher should understand that. Has she ever been in a similar situation? If not - that would account for her attitude. I think you should have another talk with her and explain that your child gets help at home too. You read to her, and in fun she is learning to count. She knows her name, address, telephone number and whom to call in case of emergency. I think that is all a good education for a child in kindergarten.

I think you should try to attend her graduation. Perhaps you could speak to your Prof. and get your assignment to prepare at home. Attending your child's graduation will show your little girl and her teacher that she is important and you tried hard. I always feel that does a lot for a child -- you are showing her that she means to most to you. Your teacher and the child's teacher are human and should be glad that you are taking the time to be present. To a mother - her child is first - everything else falls into place.

Many years ago I too had a similar situation. It was not easy. You have to give up a lot for the sake of children and in the end you will have your degree and your child will be proud of you and you with her. And I did get my degree with honors. You will too.

Tough work but you will be on top. Good luck.
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By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.

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Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

Now with this new website, Bubby can finally share her wisdom with the rest of the world. And she's excited about it! (Which confuses us, because she used to say we were all she needed.)

Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.

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