Help Me, Bubby!

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Friday, June 4, 2004
   


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Dear Bubby,

My father-in-law moved in with us 1 week ago. His wife of 63 years passed away unexpectedly 3 weeks ago. He is not well. His is 83, has prostrate cancer and is on oxygen. He is a wonderful man and we are hoping to help make the rest of his golden years good.

He was paying $900 a month rent plus all the extras that go with making life comfortable in Pennsylvania. Now that he is with us in Florida I feel that he should be paying his way. I feel that he could also pay $900 here at our home, considering that we are doing everything for him.

Help. I don't want to be a scrooge and would respect your opinion. Both my husband and I are semi-retired, but still need to work.

I also care for my Mom who is 95 yr. young and lives in a low income apt. I pay for someone to help me look after her. The money that he would give us would help a lot. Of course, if he "needed" the money for medical expenses, he would have it.

Thanks,
Bonnie


Dear Bonnie,

Your letter made me think of a sitcom. But I do sympathize with you. I am surprised at your father-in-law. It did not take him much time to decide to move in with you, and at the same time he should have been just as quick to tell you that he would contribute a certain amount of money for his living.

First he must have health coverage for which he should pay himself along with other personal expenses. And then your husband should have a talk with him about what he should contribute to living with you. This should be between your husband and his father - you are not the daughter. You are already contributing to your mother's welfare and I am sure that is not easy - and you are still working.

Your father-in-law can surely understand these circumstances and should be only too happy to pay his way - it will give him a feeling of pride and being with you and your husband will keep him happier than being alone. By all means he (your father-in-law) should pay his way and be proud of it.

Good health and good luck to all.
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Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

Now with this new website, Bubby can finally share her wisdom with the rest of the world. And she's excited about it! (Which confuses us, because she used to say we were all she needed.)

Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.


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I smell him from here
I'm gonna marry you
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Voted "Blog Of Note" on Blogger.com (2003)
4-star Review from The Weblog Review (1.5.04)
Voted "Blog Of The Day" by The Blog Hunter
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Featured in the Tampa Tribune online
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Bubby's first radio interview - 96.5 WOXL (5.4.04)
JewsWeek Jewriffic Award: "Best blog of the week" (6.6.04)
New York Times: Letter to the Editor (6.11.04)
Jerusalem Post: Feature article (7.2.04)
Interview for Akron, Ohio newspaper (aug.'04)
Golden Web Page Award (dec.'04)
Reader's Digest article, "Me Me Media" (july.'05)
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AARP Magazine article: July/August 2006 issue
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Holding Myself Back
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End Of The World
Overprotected
17 And Pregnant
The Other Woman
Grandma Troubles



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