Help Me, Bubby!

Other Bubby Books at Amazon:

Bubby Irma's Kitchen

Yiddish Your Bubbe Never Taught You

Poetry by Jewish Grandaughters

Bubbe & Gram

Bubbe's Kitchen

My Bubbe's Arms

Bubbie & Zeide's Favorite Language

Bennett and His Bubbe's Beau

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Monday, July 12, 2004
Dear Bubby,

I really like your website, and you seem to have some genuine wisdom to offer. So, here is my story: I am a husband and a father of seven children. I really love my family, so I got the very best possible job I could to support them. We live in a very rural area where jobs of any kind are hard to come by. My job is in the city 40 miles away and I work in a medical school.

My problem is that I really hate my job. There are a lot of reasons why, but no matter what reason it is this week, the one thing that doesn't change is how miserable I am to work there. I want to quit, but I know that I won't be able to find another job that pays as much money. It bothers me that I come home tired and angry, and that I'm no fun for my family to be around any more, to say the least.

So, which would you say is more important: to be happy myself or to do the best possible job of providing for my family? I have worked a number of other jobs before, and while there were certainly some I didn't like, none of them made me this consistently wretched.

--Overworked Dad

Dear Overworked Dad,

I have always said that the worst thing that could happen to a person is to get up in the morning and go to work to a job that person hates. So I can understand how you feel - and riding 40 miles to get to it. Is that driving 40 miles each way? And all that gas to boot!

I know it takes a lot of hard decisions and soul searching before one gives up a job that feeds 9 people. Still there should be a way out. You should give up your job and find something closer to home. You should take stock of your abilities - talk together with your whole family -- surely you must have one or two who are in their teens or close. Supporting a family is a family job.

Why don't you think about opening some kind of store or service place where the whole family can help. The older children can devote some time to doing neighborhood jobs like mowing lawns, baby sitting, etc. Are you trained for anything?? Maybe you could find something closer to home.

I know it is not easy at first but it will work out. But you must give up this job that you have now so that you can devote yourself to do the proper research. Speak to your present employer about how you feel and perhaps he can give you some information closer to your home. He might fire you and then you could have money to live on until you settle on something you like. I don't know in what part of the country you live but I think you are industrious enough to either make a job or find one close enough to home. And the whole family will be happy.

Good luck.


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By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.

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Click to learn more about Bubby's book

Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

Now with this new website, Bubby can finally share her wisdom with the rest of the world. And she's excited about it! (Which confuses us, because she used to say we were all she needed.)

Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.

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Voted "Blog Of Note" on (2003)
4-star Review from The Weblog Review (1.5.04)
Voted "Blog Of The Day" by The Blog Hunter
Voted "Blog Of The Day" by
Featured in the Tampa Tribune online
Featured in USA TODAY (4.22.04)
Bubby's first radio interview - 96.5 WOXL (5.4.04)
JewsWeek Jewriffic Award: "Best blog of the week" (6.6.04)
New York Times: Letter to the Editor (6.11.04)
Jerusalem Post: Feature article (7.2.04)
Interview for Akron, Ohio newspaper (aug.'04)
Golden Web Page Award (dec.'04)
Reader's Digest article, "Me Me Media" (july.'05) "Alternative Site of the Day" (aug.'05)
AARP Magazine article: July/August 2006 issue
Listed as "Cool Site Of The Day": (7.27.06)
O Globo Online: Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (aug.'06)

Bubby on itunes
Holding Myself Back
Where's My Glory?
End Of The World
17 And Pregnant
The Other Woman
Grandma Troubles

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80-year old Millie
Nice Jewish Doctor
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