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I greatly enjoy reading your advice and decided I would ask a question of my own. It is about my in-laws. They do not live in the same town as my husband and I and I think they resent this. They make unkind comments directed at me at every opportunity. For example, they make continuous comments about wanting more grandchildren (I cannot have more children, which they have been told on several occasions). My mother in-law went as far to broadcast in front of my husband's entire family that my sister-in-law was the only one who could supply her with more grandchildren!
My question is, how do I deal with them? It is basically my mother-in-law and sister-in-law who are so cruel. I have tried ignoring them but their comments do cut deep. My husband is at his wits end with them and I am trying to continue to forgive since it is important to me that our son have a relationship with BOTH sides of our families. It hurts both of us that they would be callous since our son will be the only child and it would benefit him tremendously to have tight bonds with them.
Thank you so much!
Take care, Sad Mom
Dear Sad Mom,
Instead of critiquing you and your husband for not having more children, your in-laws should be happy that you have had one child. Whether you cannot have more or decided that one is enough for you is none of their business. When they criticize you, just tell them they should be glad that you have such a sweet little boy and they should love him.
There may be a time years later when G---- will bless you with good health and you may decide to try again and you will have another child. That is what happened to one of my sisters. But for the present, since they don't live near you -- you can just be civil to them and if they bring up the subject - remind them of your physical condition.
I know a couple that called their marriage "child free" and their families accepted that. Just enjoy your little boy, and I repeat -- don't discuss pregnancy with them. What surprises me is that your sister-in-law acts the way you say. She should certainly be on your side.
I do hope this will help to bring about shalom (peace) in your family relationships. That is the best way to live. Good health and happiness to your little family.
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