Before we get to today's question, take a look at this sweet letter Bubby received today:
Welcome back Bubby! Glad to see you're feeling better. :) Take care and happy holidays
I am a solo mum to a beautiful 8 year old boy. I love him dearly but lately all we seem to do is fight. He seems to go out of his way to do little things to annoy me, or emotionally hurt me. This is most unlike his usual behavior.
I have spoken to friends and family about it and they tell me it is just a stage, and that for them he is always a delightful boy. Why then does he create so much unhappiness in our own home? I try to give him as much attention as I can, but it is hard, as I work to support us all week, then have all the house jobs to do at the weekends.
Please can you advise me on what to do to bring back our happy home.
Dear Feeling Desperate,
Why don't you start by asking your son to help you with the household chores so that he will learn that it is not easy.
Discuss with him some of the things that are upsetting you so that he will see that he has a lot to learn.
Ask him what he would do in some circumstance and correct him in his thinking.
Give him "food for thought". When he starts to upset you, tell him to stop and think and point out the logic of the situation and get him to discuss the problem with you. Ask him if he were you what would he do.
Speak in a normal tone and rationalize the problem. You can even use a funny situation in the explanation and he will laugh. The next time it happens remind him, "No shouting. Let's talk it out."
Let me hear from you. I know it is not easy to bring up an 8 year old - he is testing you as well as you are teaching him.
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