Help Me, Bubby!

Other Bubby Books at Amazon:

Bubby Irma's Kitchen

Yiddish Your Bubbe Never Taught You

Poetry by Jewish Grandaughters

Bubbe & Gram

Bubbe's Kitchen

My Bubbe's Arms

Bubbie & Zeide's Favorite Language

Bennett and His Bubbe's Beau

Click to learn more about Bubby's book

Site Disclaimer
Send your questions to
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Dear Bubby,

I'm fourteen years old and in the eighth grade. I'm in band, have many wonderful friends, get great grades, and live a wonderful life.

I had a pretty big crush on this boy. He was in many of my classes, rode my school bus, was my very close neighbor, and friend. I think he liked me back too. This was the high point in my tale.

This boy was in sports. One day at a game, there was an accident and he got a concussion. When he didn't show up at school for over two weeks, I got worried. I went to his house to see how he was. I rang the doorbell, and when he came to answer it, he didn't recognize me. He looked at me in a strange way and said, "Who are you?"

This really frightened me. I told him my name, asked if he remembered anything about me, or school. He said that, yes, he remembered his family and a few of his very close friends. But nothing else. I talked to his mother, who told me that he was suffering from huge, irreversible memory loss. At school, he didn't remember his classes, most of his friends, his teachers, etc. He did remember information that he'd learned at school, basic life skills, English, but not people, places, or "classroom rituals."

He'd forgotten me, and I was heartbroken. It was as if I'd lost a piece of me. What made me feel worse was that now that people began taking advantage of the situation. I heard some of the meanest things possible being said to him. People were asking him if he remembered who his girlfriend was (he didn't have one). Then he dropped out of our school.

I have the power to tell him that people were lying to him. Should I? Or should I just let it go? I'd really appreciate some insight on this.

"Should I, should I not?"

Dear "Should I, should I not?",

I think the best thing you can do is check on this boy from time to time. His mother can tell you how he is improving in regaining his memory. I am sure he must be going through medical care or rehab care and it will take time.

I would recommend you don't make a pest of yourself. Leave him to his professional care and hope that he will eventually regain his memory.

My best to the boy and to you.
links to this post

Links to this post:



Dear "Should I, should I not?",

I'm sure that his family and this boy are going through a very stressful time right now. If you are sincere in your friendship with this boy it might be nice to drop by and tell him and his parents (since he may not remember later) that you'd be willing to be his friend when he is ready.

Memory loss is a very complicated thing; it may be that he only forgot things before his accident, or maybe he can't lay down new memories *and* lost his long term memory, or maybe he forgets things for a while, and then remembers them later on (it's possible!) So if you do decide to be his friend, be aware that it could be very difficult to have to 're-meet' him every time you see him, but I'm sure his parents and him especially would appreciate a kind face from his old school when he's ready for it.

If you hear kids making fun of him or making rude comments to him and if it bothers you, stand up for your friend, explain to them that their behavior is mean, hurtful, and selfish, and how would you like it if it was THEM?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:33 PM  

Post a Comment

"Help Me, Bubby!" Disclaimer
By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.

Powered by Blogger Logo

Click to learn more about Bubby's book

Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

Now with this new website, Bubby can finally share her wisdom with the rest of the world. And she's excited about it! (Which confuses us, because she used to say we were all she needed.)

Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.

Bald and oblivious
Denim diagnosis
Girls are weird
Halloween ideas
I smell him from here
I'm gonna marry you
How to meet a man
Nerds go far
Political predictions
Sloppy spouse
Tastes like chicken

Voted "Blog Of Note" on (2003)
4-star Review from The Weblog Review (1.5.04)
Voted "Blog Of The Day" by The Blog Hunter
Voted "Blog Of The Day" by
Featured in the Tampa Tribune online
Featured in USA TODAY (4.22.04)
Bubby's first radio interview - 96.5 WOXL (5.4.04)
JewsWeek Jewriffic Award: "Best blog of the week" (6.6.04)
New York Times: Letter to the Editor (6.11.04)
Jerusalem Post: Feature article (7.2.04)
Interview for Akron, Ohio newspaper (aug.'04)
Golden Web Page Award (dec.'04)
Reader's Digest article, "Me Me Media" (july.'05) "Alternative Site of the Day" (aug.'05)
AARP Magazine article: July/August 2006 issue
Listed as "Cool Site Of The Day": (7.27.06)
O Globo Online: Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (aug.'06)

Bubby on itunes
Holding Myself Back
Where's My Glory?
End Of The World
17 And Pregnant
The Other Woman
Grandma Troubles

Other Jewish Bloggers:
80-year old Millie
Nice Jewish Doctor
Send us your links!

Creative Commons License
All content and images
on this website are
licensed under a
Creative Commons License.