Help Me, Bubby!

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Bubby Irma's Kitchen

Yiddish Your Bubbe Never Taught You

Poetry by Jewish Grandaughters

Bubbe & Gram

Bubbe's Kitchen

My Bubbe's Arms

Bubbie & Zeide's Favorite Language

Bennett and His Bubbe's Beau

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Wednesday, April 5, 2006
Dear Bubby,

OK. So my parents go to work and leave me alone for most of the day. So I usually go to my friend's house. Well, the other day my friend had to leave and I got jealous that she was going somewhere with her family. It made me feel like I had none.

So I called my mom on my cellphone and asked what time she would be back. When she got home, she started on a rampage about how I can't take care of myself and she has friends who have kids that can stay home alone all day. Then she said, "If you're gonna be like this, then you might as well live with your Daddy!"

Am I wrong for wanting a family? Mine is obviously dysfunctional, but am I so wrong for wanting some quality time with my mom? It seems like her job is more important than me and I hate it. She's been horrible to me for the past 2 years.

Plus, my dad hates me, for some reason, and they're going through a divorce. I have no clue if I want to stay with either of them.

What is the legal age to be "separated" from my parents (I forgot the word)? I really want out of this. Neither of them care if I'm happy or not. Just as long as I do my chores and my homework and not bother them.

13-year old girl

Dear 13-year old girl,

I felt really sorry for you when I read your letter, but look at it this way. This gives you a way to learn to take care of yourself. Has your mother laid down certain rules for you to follow while she is at work? Does she call you during the day to see if you are OK or need anything? Are you not in school while she is at work? That is where you belong. Do you go to the library until she comes home?

Why don't you sit down with your Mom and tell her how you feel. I am sure she works so that she can support both of you. You could try getting a babysitting job after school that would take up your lonely hours and you could have a lot of fun taking care of a neighbor's baby.

Did you ever try to get dinner ready and surprise your Mother? At 13, I think you can do it. Give it a try or do the marketing for her so she can get home earlier.

Try some of these suggestions and let me know how you made out.
Good Luck.
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I think you are justified in yearning for more time with your mom. We can't pick our parents and just because they are our mom or dad does not mean they will always treat us fairly or are always right. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself.

By Blogger sesame seed, at 2:11 PM  

eventhough your mum might not be there all the time, i believe she still loves you and still care.. im sure she's working hard to build a better life for you. most families i know have a problem or two (even the most loving ones). it all depends on whether you want to solve that problem or run away for life. you may wish to try to talk to her. talk abt anything from school to friends. also don't forget speak to her as if she is your bestest friend. try not to show your anger and hatred alrite =) and during your free time maybe you can go for a swim or help out in the community hospital or sth worth doing =) take care ^_^

By Anonymous passerby, at 3:03 AM  

Call Grandma! Grandmas usually understand and may be able to help.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:50 PM  

my parents are fighting bigtime plz som1 help me i think im gone over the edge im done and almost done with living! plz som 1 respond

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:03 PM  

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By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.

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Bubby is our 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93 94 year old grandmother.
A few years ago we introduced her to the internet and we've been getting daily e-mails from her ever since. When she was 87, we began this website. We now believe she is the oldest blogger on the Internet.

Whether Bubby is reminding us that boyfriends do not substitute for warm jackets in the winter, or that it's better to receive a compliment than a brick, she always has something to say to her granddaughters.

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Hopefully this will be as much fun for new readers as it will surely be for her. And if not, well, as Bubby says, it will all come out in the wash.

So, are you looking for advice on food, work, a broken heart, or the perfect bat mitzvah present?

But no dirty words allowed or you'll only get one matzah ball.

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