Ever since I found your site, I keep thinking of new things I'd like to ask.
I am turning 29 this year and have started to think about whether or not I should have kids. I've been happily married for 3 years and both of us are professionals. I know that no one can tell you whether to have kids or not, but I feel like people spend more thought buying a car or house, than they do about whether or not to have kids.
I would really like to discuss the pros and cons with someone who has kids, but I feel that this is a taboo or inappropriate subject. We currently have a wonderful, carefree life (I have no voids that need filling). I tend to think that having kids would be more work than fun, but I wonder if there is some really enjoyable aspects that make people do it (that make it actually worth the loss of time, money, and sanity).
Of course, I am well aware that most people have kids by accident, or for very stupid reasons like saving a marriage or following the herd. What is your take on kids?
Dear Working Girl,
Should you have children or not, is a question only you and your husband must decide. You have answered it yourself already, however you and your husband must make the decision together.
There are sacrifices to be made and there are joys to experience. You cannot have everything. You cannot be selfish - you have to be self-deniable. Your life changes completely when you have children. Having a child in your life and your husband's life will change everything completely and you must adjust.
Talk to your friends and you could discuss it with your doctor. He knows you best besides your husband.
No one, not even me, can say yes or no to you and it is the most important decision you will have to make in your life.
I would like to know your decision.
Links to this post:
0 OPINIONS ADDED
"Help Me, Bubby!" Disclaimer
By submitting a letter to this website, you grant Help Me, Bubby! permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere including print publications. Your letter will only include an anonymous signature that you provide or that we use to substitute for your real name. Your email address will never be included or distributed. Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that a letter will be responded to. Any information or advice given at Help Me, Bubby! is not intended to provide an alternative to professional medical treatment or to replace the advice or services of a physician or psychiatrist. Neither Bubby nor her granddaughters are professional therapists or medical experts. If you have any serious medical or mental problem, please consult a professional. Although all this advice is offered lovingly from the heart and in good spirit, we are not responsible in any way for your decision to accept or reject the advice or the results thereafter.