Bubby was mentioned in the July/August issue of the AARP Magazine ("The World's Largest Circulation Magazine"). You can also read it online here.
Good morning Bubby,
I had a deep discussion with my fiance about planning for our marriage in the near future. Originally the date had been set for June 2nd 2007, but we postponed it for many reasons. He requested that I do not bring up that "marriage" topic until he is ready. In my opinion, he should not have proposed to me if he had no intentions of marrying me; however he insisted that he does wants to, but not this year or next year, and has no set dates... not even an estimate of how many years. Mind you, I have been honest about what I desire in life before we pursued this relationship further, and he accepted it.
Now this had driven me further from him and built this wall of protection between us. We have fun together and communicate well with each other. This is the man I want to marry and he told me that he wants to have a life with me, but not marriage at this point. It seems like a contradiction in my view, but he saw marriage as pressure. We live together, and I have expressed my concerns that he is becoming too comfortable with idea of us living together (why buy a cow when you have milk for free?)
How can I communicate to him how I truly feel without him getting defensive? I even brought up the topic of me living on my own, but he saw that as a threat whereas I saw it as opportunity to either want it or discard it.
Anything from you will help...
Lost In Love
Dear Lost In Love,
I think that this guy likes getting his milk for nothing. I think that as long as he's getting what he wants, why should he take on the responsibility that something like that would really entail?
I don't see any future with him. I think you should drop him, or find a way to make him jealous. I think he's just having a good time, getting what he wants, and has no intention of marrying. It has nothing to with finances.
I think you are young and vibrant and at the age when you should be having a better commitment and looking forward to marriage. And when he keeps putting it off, he's getting what he wants without being married.
I think you should find another young man. There are plenty of fish in the sea. You're attractive and you can certainly find one.
Let me know how it works out!
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2 OPINIONS ADDED
Dear Lost in love, I was in the same boat. my bf told me he had never had any plan to marry me. then I though myself that it was not rational either to waste my time or stay with him, Bubby is right there are plenty of fish in the sea and it is not the end of the world, try somebody else and enjoy your life!
By 4:30 PM, at
I've just read your update, congratulations to ya on winning this guy's heart forever!
By 5:45 AM, at
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